Life...

I have contemplated life a lot lately.  It is probably due to the little one that is growing and developing inside me.

Even though my pregnancies have been rough on me I have quiet moments when I ponder the miracle that I am allowed to share in.  It overwhelms me almost to tears sometimes.  Being a mom is more amazing that I ever thought possible.  As a teenager I didn't value mothers or really aspire to me one to be honest.  Now I hardly know that person.

It saddens me that there are those that don't understand what they are destroying when they have an abortion.  I know there is a debate when life starts and to be honest I don't understand it.  Any woman that has been pregnant can feel their baby move, so how could you deny that there is more there than a just body developing completely void of life?

It is amazing to me and as I feel that chapter in my life may come to close with this baby, I do feel sad, but completely grateful that I was given this opportunity.  I don't feel I deserved it, but appreciate it very much!

I think I always wanted to be a mom, I just forgot as I got older.  When I was little I used to sing a song all the time.  "When I grow up, I want to be a mother.  Have a family.  One little, two little, three little babies of my own."  Of course as a three or four year old the words came out much different: fambowee and maver (mother).  But I think deep down it stuck with me.  I love my kids so much and see what a huge blessing and miracle they are in my life. 

They are truly little pieces of Heaven to remind us where we came from and where we want to end up.